Black Wednesday Theme

Soundgarden - "Fell on Black Days"

#68

Waking from a restful night, you turn to your lover's side of the bed only to find it cool and empty. Looking out the window of the loft, a barn you have converted to a house, you see the sun creeping lazily over the horizon foretelling yet another halcyon spring day. As your body becomes more alert, you feel a compelling desire to find your mate. Pulling on loose pants and wellies, you head out to the animal quarters knowing that you'll find your dearest already hard at work milking, feeding and caretaking her beloved farm friends.

Peeking around the corner of the stall, you see your partner just finishing the milking of her favorite Jersey. She is dressed in her railroad overalls, a small shirt underneath revealing the swell of her perfect immaculate breasts. Her hair still ruffled from sleep and pulled loosely to her neck with a leather tie. You know she will smell of fresh hay, sleep and sunshine, making your desire hasten. She sets her full frothy milk pail to the side all the time muttering to her bovine friend. She strokes her cow lovingly, massaging her forelock and you are already thinking how her strong hands will feel on your manhood.

You step quickly and silently behind her, reaching around and grasping her full heavy breasts, startling her.You keep her locked to you, not letting her turn around as you slide your hand deep into her jeans finding her naked. Instantly she is wet knowing that you will pleasure her in all ways. You push her down into the fragrant hay, clawing her clothing off anxious to put mouth to tangy crevice. She submits and her sighs of delight quicken your staff. Not able to wait you climb her body and plunge deep into her waiting warmth. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.................

Awwwww, so nice...

Hey look, even my horoscope loves me (but like many of my erstwhile suitors, has faulty grammar) -

Getting out of the doldrums is easier than it seems. All you have to do is go and see all your pals and how much they missed -- that will yank you out of a humdrum mood faster than anything else. Everyone is glad to see you with your special spark reignited. Draw some positive energy from all those smiling faces that come into view. Trust that you are beloved. The world shows you its smiling side.

Run Away!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And rejoice upon eating the minstrels...

Black Wednesday approaches quickly and without remorse. Very cleverly I have refused to acknowledge said epic moment in hopes that it will give me a miss and I can just carry on merrily in my self-delusion. Unfortunately, I think it has cunningly ferreted out my plan and is waiting on cat paws to pounce, rip out my eyeballs by the optic nerve, swing them gaily around like a bolero (those clever cow-catching devices that look mysteriously like clackers used by vaqueros in Argentina), and fling them into a pointy object such as a very prickly cactus.

On the lighter side, I was asked this weekend about my happiness at this very moment in time. And, I had to respond that other than my lack of a significant other to torture, I was pretty damn happy and well-adjusted. I've got a couple of jobs that I dig, some pets that are really stupendous, a family that supports me and tells me when I have something in my teeth, some long-term goals, and my hiney gets smaller by the day, perhaps even hour. I have nothing to speak of in the way of wrinkles, flaps or physical overages, unles you count a lovely bosom that still resides north of my navel. I have good friends that think I am a riot and occassionally I have a really super date (this past Saturday ranking right up there with all timers).

Not bad for a woman with little if any maturity, in complete denial about reaching a certain age, and truly a fantastic catch waiting for her knight. MMMmmm, life is good!

You People!!

What I am confused about is where do dairy products and fermented beverages fit into all of this?? I have juice fasted before for rather extensive (or I believe so) time periods, but sucking the prana out of the atmosphere in this day and age could really be deleterious. This bears further research into the extant breatharians. Where do they live? How long can they survive? Do they go invisible when turned sideways? How do they keep from just floating away?

These and other burning pranic inquiries...

Noxious Nocturnes

Disrruptive, disturbing, fraught with emotional distress. Death, disease, daring-do in competetive martial arts. Last eve found me writhing, wriggling and wishing it would end, but end it did not until the late dawn hours when Clyde's twittering punctured my REM to relieve me of the psychic torture being perpetrated by my subconscious. Stress, drastically lowered blood sugar and anxiety all conspired to make my nighttime hours exceptionally painful. I awoke all fuzzy and then proceeded to slice off the end of my thumb with a lovely French "shiv" while dicing pomegranite for my feathered felons. Shock ensued. I lay on the cool tile of the kitchen hoping to retain my bile, and draw blood back to my light head.

OY! What a morning!

Rah! Rah! Rah!

You liked wearing a costume when you were a kid, and college was pretty fun. Then you went through a young adult phase where you thought it was stupid, and now you think it is fun again.

The Grand Finale...

Bitch at me enough and I will eventually do what you want. SO, here are accumulated pictures from the last couple of weeks. Some of Chino, Happy, Pepper, the visiting Hounds and Dittles' encounter with squirrel poop.

Hail to the Chief!!

As of 12:00p.m. today, we are no longer in the throes of a campaign/election year marked by much finger-pointing, a-hem-ing, accusation and firmly planted party solidarity. In light of that, no matter who your candidate was, did your life change today as a result of the outcome?? The last 6-8 months have been fraught with the concerns of a much divided populace knowing conclusively that their candidate was the best man. I imagine that there have been fisticuffs, brawls, sprawls and hair-pulling over the adequacy/inadequacy of respective nominees. However, in this moment, this final moment when the votes have been tabulated, the runner-up has conceeded, did your world cease to spin? Will it cease in the next 4 years? Will you go out tomorrow and find a red sky, purple water and pigs with wings??

What is REALLY important?

Diametrically Opposed

THE Metroplex. Ringed by a loop that looks oddly like a penis and scrotum turned upside down. And inside of this asphalt lingum two very distinct peoples, Fort Worthians and Dallasites. I am a Worthian and have very definite opinions about Dallasites, not particularly unfavorable, just differences I see or perceive. I feel lost when I go to Dallas. Not literally or culturally, mind you, but aesthetically and socially. Dallas is all buildings crammed one 'gainst t'other, maniacal drivers, expensive cars and Manolo Blahniks. Everything seems to be on display... the more you have, the more you fit in. Fort Worth on the other hand is historic facades, maniacal drivers in Dualleys/Dooleys, expensive horse trailers and Anne Kleins. The more you have, the more you disguise it. Dallas is frenetic. Fort Worth is casual. I imagine that Dallasites have their own opinions of us BoHunks o'er here in the West.

I love that two cities can live mere miles apart and be so distinguished.

Ack! True Disaster

I shall horde them...

USATODAY.com - Mother Nature puts squeeze on tomato production

BOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HAH!! Bet ya thought I was done with all this nonsense... Well, I fooled you. Arisen from an animal induced coma, I have returned to the keyboard to pound out more mercilessly inane chatter about my life, aspirations, birds, dogs, boobs and other miscellany.

The overwhelming obsession is my upcoming Day of Birth celebration. Yep... It's the big one, or the biggest one for me yet. Ummmm, yeah well, tautologically speaking that would have to be true...

Moving on... Normally I am inordinately jazzed, frothy, torqued even about my yearly aging. But in this 40tieth year since my birth I am stricken with feelings of inadequacy, unbelief, and dis-shevlement saturated with more healthy but less pervasive inklings of accomplishment, self-awareness and bliss. It's the age-old complaint when reaching milestones and I have succumbed to mainstream Americana this time. I am no different. I will feel no differently and I will probably celebrate as will millions of other average twits on this really not-so-auspicious day.

On the other hand, I am still an amazing hottie and can attract men half my age for meaningless evening carousing and boasting... And I still fit into my highschool cheerleading outfit. HAH!!!!

Premonitions...

Chatting gaily at our favorite Bar&Grill, the birds whistled and strutted. This place was one of the group's favorites - a large enclosed outside aviary with resident parrots in free flight and pet parrots welcome to visit and play in the spacious quarters. Chino (called "Bryan" in this dream) made occassional visits to my shoulder for reassurance and kisses but spent most of his time intimidating the other Amazons and looking for unattended snack plates. Eventually we left, and for some reason I forgot "Bryan", and didn't realize it until we were almost home. Running crazily back to the Bar&Grill, I was ashamed of my own irresponsibility at leaving "Bryan". The place was closed but I could see the bartender doing his side work and I banged on the door. He let me in, and I cried out for "Bryan" hoping he would immediately come to my side. The bartender kept trying to foist off other birds on me, but all of them had yellow heads and "Bryan" has no yellow at all. Several little handicapped birds perched expectantly on my arms and shoulders but none were "Bryan". I was frantic - calling, begging, pleading for "Bryan" to come to me. More parrots with yellow heads rustled up as I began to lose hope, and then "Bryan" materialized out of the phycus and came sweetly to my shoulder.

MAN...talk about anxiety dream. But even so, listen to what REALLY happened...

I go to work and mid-morning get a ringy-dingy from Betty, the Pet Haven director. "Do you want a couple of Amazons?" she asks.
"Okily Dokily," I respond.
"Well, I've called someone else and you're just my back-up, but I wanted to check."
"Sure, just call if you need help."

About a million calls later and rescuing Betty from her sense of misdirection, I absorb a Double Yellow Head, and a Yellow Naped Amazon into my living room.

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm??

Rain Check, Please!

All sweaty and flushed from teaching an invigorating cycle class this morning, I approached the front desk to log my hour and I could see the rain pounding outside. I slopped to my car, even more wet from the deluge and headed back towards home, clouds so thick the sun was giving dawn a miss. Humid, cozy home awaited me blanketed in dusky invitation. The birds were still lightly snoozing and the dogs were still snoodled under the duvet. I wanted to do a little snoodling as well. A Rain-Day... yummy warm breakfast tea thick with cream, flannel comfy pants with little cows and moons, some piñon incense to promote the scent-memory of a Santa Fe fire, my book and my animal companions, a grand recipe for a stormy day.

Alas, plopped in front of my computer, I'm dripping around work and am consoled with the thought of Mom's squiche for dinner.